I have always coveted marriage, I’ve always wanted to get married, I’ve been obsessed by this idea for such a long time! I’ve always thought of marriage as this beautiful unison between a caring man and a loving woman, a unison in which they learn to understand each other, to live with each other, to care for each other but that’s all nonsense.
I realized lately that the thing I would hate to do most is to get married; it’s not that I don’t need a man in my life, I do! But I refuse to get a man and let him enslave me or even worse, misery me.
I don’t see the point in being married with someone and not talk to him for weeks or months, or being married with someone and hating him deep inside, or being married with someone who claims to be flexible and modern but when it comes to his wife, he’s stiff and intolerant.
Now, what I’ve written so far may be shocking to most men, but that’s not going to stop me from finishing what I have to say. Believe it or not, I don’t hate men; at least I don’t hate real Men.
You’re going to ask me this: “And who is the real man?”
- The real man is the one who respects the woman as such.
- The real man is the one who marries a woman for who she is and not for what she can do.
- The real man is the one who treats his wife the way he wishes his mum or sister to be treated.
- The real man is the democratic one, not the hypocrite who is open and modern on the outside while tight and primitive on the inside.
- The real man is the one who calls for his wife’s respect without eradicating that of his wife.
- …
A man for me is made to be respected, glorified and treasured only if he deserves it and a man deserves to be respected, glorified and treasured only if he acts like a man.
A man is not a man if he brutalizes his wife be it physically or verbally. A man is not a man if he enslaves his wife and thinks that she’s part of his possessions. A man is not a man if he thinks that it’s his wife’s duty to do the housework while he’s watching TV. A man is not a man if he asks his wife to stay at home and refuses to take her out during the week-end for the sole excuse that he’s been working the whole week and that he needed rest. A man is not a man if he chooses to have children and denies them his love again for the sole excuses that’s he’s tired…
Marrying a man like the one above would be a calamity for me. I don’t know if I’ll ever get married or not, but for sure I will never marry a man if I suspect him to be this way. Marriage is supposed to be about sharing, sharing differences and similarities, sharing worries and understanding, sharing views and insights, sharing love and detestation, sharing everything in life while still remaining together.
That’s marriage for God’s sake!
